


Hocus Pocus

by SleepyStargazer



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Accidental summoning, Alternate Universe - Underfell (Undertale), Asexuality, Based on a Tumblr Post, Bullying, Characters Reading Fanfiction, Characters to be added, Cruelty, Demisexuality, Female Reader, Gen, I Blame Tumblr, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I just love writing, I returned to the bandwagon, Magical Accidents, Original Character(s), Original Female Character(s) - Freeform, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Reader Is Not Chara, Reader Is Not Frisk, Reader is a mage, Self-Indulgent, Slow Burn, Slow To Update, Tags May Change, Underfell Sans (Undertale), Write-It-Motherfuckers prompt, character exploration, no one is happy, rated for language, welcome to hell - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-09
Updated: 2019-06-13
Packaged: 2020-02-28 20:43:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18763870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SleepyStargazer/pseuds/SleepyStargazer
Summary: Prompt byWrite-It-MotherfuckersIt's common sense tonotread things aloud, right? Especially when it's a spell out of a book, or it should be common sense. Look at the Mummy series, for instance! All sorts of bad things followed reading strange spells from books.Unfortunately, our dear Reader, a mage in training, doesn't seem to know that. With one amazing cockup, she has managed to do the seemingly impossible—drag a character out of a fictional universe. Who's to say she didn't summon more than one? All she knows is the one she did summonreallyhates her guts and he's going to live with her for the unforeseen future.Someone, send help!Edit: Tags have been changed due to a sharp turn down another idea's lane.





	1. Oh no.

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Prompt](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/480100) by Write-It-Motherfuckers. 
  * Inspired by [Skeleton Squatters and the Landlady](https://archiveofourown.org/works/9816140) by [Tyrant_Tortoise](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tyrant_Tortoise/pseuds/Tyrant_Tortoise). 
  * Inspired by [Bones, Picked Clean](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11692404) by [lulu-writes (luluwrites)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/luluwrites/pseuds/lulu-writes). 



> A self-indulgent fanfiction that will end up in a Landlady and Skeleton Squatters/Bones Picked Clean set up eventually. It's all for the sake of playing around with the Undertale AUs, learning how each character feels to me (again), and just having fun!
> 
> The original prompt can be found **[here.](https://write-it-motherfuckers.tumblr.com/post/184516988850/you-hadnt-meant-anything-by-it-hadnt-even)**

 

You hadn’t meant anything by it, hadn’t even expected it to do anything in the first place, especially given the fact that you weren’t even putting any true intent into it. Those were the biggest requirements of all spells after all. Magic, and intent. It wasn’t even what the spell was meant for.

And yet here you are.

You had been researching for hours when you had finally had enough, abandoning your spell books and charts for the joys of fanfiction. The perfect means for escape and procrastination, as you would _often_ tell your friends.

Leaning against your bed, you scrolled through fanfiction after fanfiction, soon loosing yourself into a particularly good one that featured one of your favourite characters. Over time you found yourself growing more and more invested into the fanfiction, cheeks beginning to hurt from how often you found yourself grinning or giggling. 

_Fuck how you wished they were real_.

Glancing up from the fanfiction as you accidentally knocked over one of your spell books, you sighed, looking at your abandoned work and then back at the story you had just finished. Remembering one of the spells you had been told to research, you smirked, murmuring it lowly under your breath as you thought of the character.

The moment the final words passed through your lips, the whole room shuddered, lights flickering and energy zapping almost painfully through the air, setting your teeth on edge and reminding you vaguely of the feeling your mentors banishing spells had, only magnified beyond comprehension. A loud tearing sound echoed in the room, followed by a thunderous boom that had your hands snapping up to cover your ears instantly, a strangled noise of discomfort escaping you, only to be swallowed up in the chaos of your backfiring spell.

Finally everything grew still, your ears left ringing as silence slowly descended. A soft grunt was what finally broke you out of your stupor, your body jerking upright from it’s fetal position as you glanced over the room quickly and nervously.

Slowly pushing themselves into an upright position, the stranger looked around in bewilderment for a moment as well, pausing once your gazes locked. You could feel as your brain practically short circuited at the sight, eyes wide as you tried to understand how a simple detection spell ~~_someone must have_ Really _fucked up_ That _translation_~~ had managed to summon one of your favourite characters from a _completely_ different realm of reality. 

“ _.._..Oh _shit_ -”

And that was a very appropriate response as a spear of bone— _was that a **femur**?!_—shot at you and the skeleton’s left socket flared to life with magic. It was by pure _luck_ that the protective rune scheme activated before it could skewer you, leaving it buried deep into the faintly glowing, green barrier.

“a fuckin’ mage?!” Sans growled, the magic in his socket only growing brighter. “where are we? where’s my brother?”

“I swear, this was an accident. I was researching a detection spell and reading to myself— _Stars and moon above, why did I do that?! I am so fucking stupid! I knew better than to do that!—_ and it backfired then you were here and I am _so_ sorry,” you rambled without pause or even the briefest breath, berating yourself for your thoughtlessness.

“sorry ain’t gonna do shit, _mage,_ “ he snarled, your ‘class’ ( _your very species)_ smacking you like a vulgar curse. “send me back. **_n o w_**.”

A whine slipped from your throat as you shrank into yourself, eyes darting wildly around the room. “I-I… We’re gonna have a problem with that? I’m not really sure where the spell messed up—probably the translation, or they _really_ put it into the wrong category—and I’ve never heard of something like this actually working outside fiction, my mentor said summoning was a dodgy subject just like necromancy? Even though her mate works as a necromancer so they can question the dead and find the people who killed them, but you have to have an affinity for it. I don’t have an affinity either, if anything, I’ve an affinity for healing and I’m rambling. I’m sorry. I don’t know how to help you.”

“great, so yer fuckin’ useless. ‘splain why i shouldn’t rip out yer soul an’ kill ya?”

“…Because the one who _might_ be able to help would kill you?”

Sans’ sockets narrowed as the magic flaring from his socket slowly dimmed down and the bone spear faded. “an’ who might they be, mage?”

Teeth tugged and gnawed on poor lips while you fidgeted under the gaze filled with utter loathing. Words were there, but—

“well, mage, spit it the fuck out,” he snapped.

“My mentor!”

**-*-**

“Child, when I assign you spells to research, I had _hoped_ you’d have the common sense to _not_ read them aloud,” drawled your mentor. Minerva, a proud woman with silver-peppered black hair pulled into a high bun and soft laugh lines that did nothing to soften her scowl, stood tall as she settled her gaze on you.

You stilled your shifting form and, staring down at your mentor’s black flats, clenched your hands around bent knees. It was embarrassing as you knelt before her, much to the snickering of the accidentally summoned skeleton.

“Nevertheless, you have already made a mess of this.” She motioned generally at Sans and ignored his warning growl. “I think this is a _known_ first. You should feel proud, child, that you’ve so _successfully_ breached the walls of the multiverse. Now, as your reward for such a _fantastic_ use of common sense—”

“reward? this stupid bitch is gettin’ a _reward_ for this shit?!”

Minerva turned her scowl, frosty like the early winter mornings that dipped in the negatives, on him for his interruption. “Are you quite _done_ , Mister Sans, or are you going to interrupt me again to insult my student?” She listened to his grumbles and continued, “As I was saying, your reward for such a _marvelous_ and _spectacular_ blunder, you will be housing Mister Sans, as well as any _others_ you may have summoned here, while _I_ attempt to contact my colleagues for their input. Do you understand?”

You shrank into yourself under her piercing, disapproving gaze, and nodded your head slowly. “Yes, ma’am…”

“Good.” She turned her gaze on Sans. “Mister Sans, all I can implore of you is that you be patient as we work on resolving this… _issue…_ as fast as possible, and that you don’t give the child too much trouble. She means well, for all that she’s apparently lacking in common sense.”

“i ain’t promisin’ shit, mage. just get me back home.”

“We will certainly try.”


	2. Flocks of Flying Fucks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we see Reader and Sans interact, flocks of flying fucks are given, and we get a minor world building dump.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to say that I was high on cough medicine and sick when writing half of this chapter. I'm not entirely sure if that was a good thing or not.

Even in your world, mages and 'magical' creatures were considered myths and folktales. Magic was all imagination and special effects, tricks of the mind and sleight of hand. None of existed because it was all fantasy, one shared with nearly everyone who desired an escape from the 'real' world.

And everyone who knew different was happy with that.

If they were fiction, myths, or simply forgotten, then they were safe. Mages did not fear being hunted down and burned at the stake because that would be murder and insanity. Mermaids, or mers in general, were safe because humans had gotten so much _better_ at projecting their presence, and they were so much better at _avoiding_ those humans because of that. Werewolves, vampires, and so many other creatures were safer the further into dreams and fantasy their existences faded.

“Madame Minerva is pretty strict on house rules, since, y’know, she owns the place. There aren’t many either; don’t leave the lights on in empty rooms, remember chores, pick up after yourself, call if you’re gonna be out past midnight—” You rambled as, after Minerva left, you gathered up your spell books and laptop in your messenger bag.

“mage.”

“—and don’t let the fae in or share your name with them. Basically boils down to, ‘Use Common Sense.’ I mean, why would you share your name with a fae? Everyone knows that they’ll own your ass that way because you’re giving them _you_ when you give your name. They’re really tricky. Oh, and full moons aren’t really good nights to go out because mers, well sirens, are a lot stronger and werewolves tend to—”

“ ** _m a g e,”_** Sans barked. “shaddup an’ take a fuckin’ breath, or ya like the sound of yer own voice that much?”

You squeaked. “No?”  
****

“fuckin’ seems like it. now, let’s get one thin’ straight ‘tween us, a’ight? i don’t give a flyin’ fuck ‘bout yer ‘madame’s’ rules, ‘bout yer ‘madame’, or ya; you mages can go fuckin’ choke on yer blood an’ die fer all i care. ya do ya an’ i’ll do me, got it?”

Oh, you got it, alright, you thought as you studied the interesting, swirling grains in the wooden floor. It was impossible not to get it, but you couldn’t let it lie. He didn’t _know_ , or he wasn’t listening to common sense.

“answer me, mage.”

Your mouth felt parched, a desert barren of words and moisture, as you reluctantly dragged your eyes upwards to meet Sans’ sockets. Dark, endless voids stared into you, peering into your soul.

_**You felt your sins dance the chacha down your spine** _

“Do I have much of a choice?” You shook your head and offered a weak smile. “Unfortunately, I give a _flock_ of flying fucks about you, Sans, and your brother. We can get things you need, or want, tomorrow, and get your room picked out tonight. Sound fair?”

Without giving him time to answer, you turned on your heels and, swerving around the couch and the skeleton himself, headed towards the stairs. Hopefully, he’d follow soon enough.

**-*-**

Sans didn't follow. His senses were still reeling from the jarring differences between the Underground and the world he found himself now—and wasn't _that_ a punch to his nonexistent guts? Some novice _mage_ pulled him into a different universe. A universe where he could taste the magic as it filled the air, so pure and fresh that he found it suffocating. A universe where he could feel its magic urging him to relax and let it heal him...

Yeah, no, that wasn't gonna happen. Relaxing in a different world? In a world with mages, where he was forced to _stay_ with a mage? Not very fucking likely.

And wasn't that just fucking ironic?

A mage pulled him—just him, only him ~~(he hoped)~~ —out of the Underground by _accident_. A mage pulled him out of a place that its own kind imprisoned his in, and it wanted to put him back. It wanted to take him out of this world with its pure magic like a body purging itself of tainted magic.

That was fine. He wanted to go back; he didn't want to stay in a world crawling with mages, not when it could sign his death warrant faster than the Underground itself. At least if he died in the Underground, he'd know who killed him _~~(and he wouldn't stay dead for long, the anomaly would Reset sooner or later; he wasn't so sure that would work here)~~._

Sans stuffed his hands in his jacket pockets and growled lowly as that thought bounced around his skull. It'd be so fucking easy to kill the mage before it could kill him. He could kill it as painfully as its kind deserved and absorb its soul, or keep it on him, before he went back. It'd be the last soul they'd need for the Barrier, the last soul before they could exterminate humans like the rats they are. But he couldn't kill it yet, he reminded himself. He needed it and its madame to help send him back.

“Sans?”

His skull snapped towards the stairwell just visible from where he stood in the living room. He could feel the mage's soul directly above him, tempting him with plans for its death and not-yet captured soul. Shaking the plans away, he locked onto the soul—vibrating with a medley of nervous excitement, shame, and embarrassment—and took a step through the Void. Might as well get the damn show on the road.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, dears! If you've reached the end, I'd like to say thank you so much for your interest so far. It's really encouraging, so why not go an extra step and leave a comment and kudos? Those _are_ the lifeblood of any fanfiction writer out there, and none of us are ashamed to admit it.
> 
> In other news, I'd like to say that I'm currently looking for a beta reader for Hocus Pocus! As my beginning note said, I actually wrote most of this chapter while high on cough medicine and sick, which honestly has/had me nervous to post this chapter. I'm hardly even sure if Sans (Red) is still in character or if Reads is in character with what we've all seen already. The role of beta would have that person(s) subjected to my rather frivolous thoughts, short character drabbles/experiments, headcanons, the (shoddy) chapters themselves, and playlists. I'll have a discord set up for my beta(s) to set up shop, if anyone is interested in it.
> 
> Well, the discord could easily be set up for anyone wanting to talk, too. Leave comments below if you're interested in any of it. I look forward to hearing back from you, dears!
> 
>  **Edit:** Here's the link to the discord I mentioned setting up. Feel free to click [Here](https://discord.gg/ejV2pSz) and join!


	3. Like Acid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Mage reflects and the new day comes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! So, this chapter was supposed to be longer, but my brain decided it was time to cut it off and give people a chapter... and give me time to prepare for Red himself. I also edited the tags, if you haven't seen them yet. I have a very good reason for it aside from the "sharp turn", but I'm keeping it to myself (mostly) for now!
> 
> This chapter was edited by Jezzi!

Shutting your door behind you, you sank to the soft, carpeted floor and let your head thunk against the door quietly. This was a day to remember, and you weren't exactly certain you _wanted_ to remember.

So many things had gone wrong in a single instant; things you never expected could go wrong. Summoning a supposedly _fictional_ character? That wasn't supposed to happen. Summoning an even _more_ fictional version of that character? That was just fanfiction bullshit.

You should know. You read so many Sans/Reader fanfictions to know that it was a popular fiction trope. And what made you sick with yourself about this all?

You were proud of yourself.

Madame Minerva had a budding migraine, another person was stranded—alone, as far as you knew—in another _universe_ , and you were proud that you hadn't fainted in front of Sans. You had caused the biggest fuck-up in your life, and you were so proud that you hadn't fainted.

It had been so tempting, too. The hate oozing off of the skeleton was a dark, suffocating miasma, and you were its target. You could still feel it burning away at your sensitive magic like acid on flesh, leaving everything painfully raw, and there was nothing you could do for it. Sans had good reasons for hating you.

You pushed yourself up and shuffled to your bed, collapsing on top of the covers once your knees hit the edge. Slowly, you migrated under your blankets, shed your clothes, and tugged a worn fox plush into your arms. Part of you hoped sleep would come for you, despite the growling snores rumbling through the walls.

But sleep didn't come.

The hurt you had been almost successfully shoving into a forgotten corner of your mind clawed its way to the forefront of your mind and burned like a flashfire. Choking on sobs, you clutched the fox closer and buried your face into its silver fur before you could wake your... guest.

 _'Aren't you useless? Just pathetic,'_ a small voice hissed in the back of your mind ' _but what else could you be? Just a little hate pointed at you, and you break down. You deserve it, don't you? He has every right to hate you, a mage.'_

But you weren't the one who imprisoned them! You weren't even from the same universe!

_'And it doesn't seem to mean anything to Sans. Or you. You know exactly how to make the pain go away too, isn't that right? Wouldn't it just be poetic if a mage was the last soul to free the monsters? Wouldn't it be nice to be useful, for once in your life?'_

Wouldn’t it…?

Your arms tightened around the fox as you roughly shook your head. No, no. It wouldn’t, and that little voice could go away now. Please and thank you. You didn’t need another source of venom, you…

You had Sans for that.

_And, for some reason, that made it all the worse._

*******

A scream died before it could breach your lips as pain—excruciating, burning agony—chased you from dreams and reality greeted you with heaving lungs, cold sweat, and phantom pains. Shuddering, you shoved at your tangle of blankets until they were finally banished to the floor in a misshapen heap and your shudders were from the sudden chill, rather than half-forgotten nightmares.

~~_You couldn’t remember what it was about, but you remembered the_ **_p a i n_ ** _._~~

Sunlight crept through the crack in your curtains as you pulled yourself together; allowing it to dance across your bare skin. Soft warmth chased the chill from your bones, and you let the pleasant sensation follow you as your eyes slid shut.

On a gentle exhale, you imagined a lavender haze slowly creeping from your body and obscuring your room. It muted the snores from Sans's room and coaxed a quiet, haunting melody to reign in its place. You could feel your magic, painfully raw, settle beneath the haze.

Inhale, you could see faerie lights dancing through the haze and feel their warmth grazing your face as they passed you by. The memories they contained flickered on the edge of your mind, tugging at your soft focus, and you let them go with a brief acknowledgement.

Exhale— **_“Shot through the heart, and you're to blame! Darlin', you give love a bad name!”_ **—and you snapped back into reality, your right hand already fumbling with your locked phone.

You slumped in on yourself as you read the new message and sighed.

 **ShinyFucker:** morning sunflower

 **You:** Morning, Lark.

 **ShinyFucker:** sleep well?

 **You:** I slept. Does that count?

 **ShinyFucker:** w/ u no

 **ShinyFucker:** r u still up 4 2day

 **ShinyFucker:** or no

Were you still up for today? You still had to take Sans shopping, pick up more food, and work on your major's project.

 **ShinyFucker:** sunflower u there?

_Fuck it._

**You:** Maybe. Temp roommate to get set up, but I think I might?

 **ShinyFucker:** roommate?

 **ShinyFucker:** mead or wake up?

 **You:** Mead's, noon?

 **ShinyFucker:** noon is gud.

 **ShinyFucker:** no distracting me.

 **ShinyFucker:** now about this roommate sunflower.

Snorting, you turned off the phone screen and abandoned it on your pillows. You were dumb, but not _that_ dumb. Lark could learn some patience, and you could enjoy what little time you had left of peace without thoughts of Sans.

No thoughts about Sans…

No thoughts about…

Your eyes landed on your dresser’s mirror, skated around your very nude reflection, and focused on the pair of plush dolls sitting innocently on your desk. The Sans doll— _ the classic and probably ~~hopefully~~ less spiteful version _ —was taunting you with its wide grin from beside its Papyrus. Drifting to the right of the dolls, your gaze rested briefly on the bone pun mug before taking in Blaster statuette.  


No thoughts about Sans? Easier said than done.  


You might as well ask for the moon to fall from the sky or for Sans himself to be kinder to you. Neither of those, you were certain, were going to happen anytime soon, either.

Ignoring the misery nesting in your guts, you threw yourself into getting ready for the day. You could give it company all you wanted later, there were other things you needed to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, comments are the lifeblood of a writer and always appreciated! Thank you for reading, and I hope you continue to enjoy the story. 
> 
> I'm still open to more betas if anyone's interested, the more the merry (and better for when other betas are busy)! My discord is also open for people too, if anyone's interested in it. As I said in the previous chapter's end note, feel free to click [Here](https://discord.gg/ejV2pSz) and join! And if you can't click the link, here it is again for you to copy and paste! https://discord.gg/ejV2pSz
> 
> See you around, dears! Auf Wiedersehen! Au revoir!


End file.
